VIRTUS       What Do I Say Now?      Self Safety Guidance Program

Child Abuse Prevention Month Prayer, April 2007

VIRTUS: Joining Together to Protect God’s Children

Sex Abuse Prevention Programs Combine Best Practices with Continuous Improvement

The Diocese of Tulsa is among the nation’s leaders in responding to the child sexual abuse crisis in the Catholic Church and is well on the way to fully implementing the Protecting God’s Children™ programs and other elements of the VIRTUS® programs. These programs were developed over the last five years by The National Catholic Risk Retention Group, Inc. (National Catholic), a not-for-profit organization that provides risk control services to approximately one-third of the Catholic dioceses across the country.

Unbeknownst to many, the Diocese of Tulsa has had an inside track in the effort. The AGOS GROUP, LLC, a Tulsa-based risk management company has overseen development of National Catholic’s program dating back to 1997. In 1998, the National Catholic board appointed an ad hoc committee to work with the nation’s premier child sexual abuse experts to develop prevention and response programs. Sharon Doty, a long-time Tulsa resident and lifelong Catholic is a consultant on the project and has organized and directed the work of these experts for the last four years.

The Diocese implemented this VIRTUS program in February, 2003, and since then more than 8,400 people from around the Diocese have attended a session. At the end of 2004, more than 243 sessions have been offered in more than 62 sites around the diocese. 

"What Do I Say Now? "

In compliance with Article 12 of the USCCB Charter for the Protection of Children and Young People, the Diocese has started a parish-based Parent Education Program to help answer questions many parents have asked when attending a VIRTUS session, "How do I talk to my child/children about sexual abuse?"

The program features the video, What Do I Say Now?, as well as additional materials to aid in this difficult discussion including how to teach your child key touching safety rules and how to respond to a child's disclosure of abuse.

For more information about this program, contact your parish or the Office of Catechetical Services, 918/294-1904.

Self Safety Guidance Program for Children & Youth

Bishop Slattery has decided to use the program developed by and currently in place in the Archdiocese of Oklahoma City. Beginning January 2005, this program will be implemented in all parish religious education programs throughout the diocese. This will assure our compliance with the Charter.

This program, Self Safety Guidance Program, (SSGP) in brief, is a personal safety program for children and youth which includes information about appropriate behavioral and physical boundaries between adults and children and what to do if those boundaries are violated. This safe environment program will be standard, permanent elements of Catholic education in the parish RE programs for all grades.

Before the implementation of this SSGP, an orientation meeting for parents is essential. The orientation meeting should begin with the trained parish facilitator presenting the “What Do I Say Now?” parent education program. Following this program, parents will have an opportunity to view the Self Safety Guidance Program for their child’s grade.   

 Coordinators of Religious Education, Coordinators of Youth Ministry, Catechists, and Parents must realize this program

•  is not an option for any parish;

•  is not a sex education program, but rather a safe environment program to educate children on keeping themselves safe;

•  is strongly recommended for all children and youth, but parents have the option of removing their children from these classes.

At the end of each year, parishes will report from all RE programs. You will be asked to send a parish attendance report to the Office of Catechetical Services. This report will simply be the number of children who received this safe environment instruction.

For more information, contact the Department of Religious Formation, 918/294-1904.

Differences Between Educational Programs:

As of January 3, 2005, 6,200 paid employees and volunteers in the Diocese of Tulsa have attended the VIRTUS program. This past February, the Diocese began training facilitators for a parish-based parent education program, What Do I Say Now? The goal of both of these programs is to inform and educate adults on what steps need to be taken to provide a safe environment for our children.

Most parents who have attended the VIRTUS Training comment on the new insights they have learned regarding how they need to be instruments in protecting children from sexual abuse in all the environments in which our children participate. The program for parents, What Do I Say Now? reinforces what they learned from VIRTUS and provides parents the safety rules and tools needed to discuss sexual abuse with their children.

VIRTUS and What Do I Say Now? are programs that do not educate parents on how we talk with our children about human sexuality. The parent program does have a handout, Children’s Principal Stages of Development for parents. This handout provides parent’s answers to some of the questions children may ask about sex at different age appropriate levels of their development.

Parents equate talking with their children about sexual abuse is the same as talking with their children about human sexuality. Certainly, talking with children about sexual abuse may lead to additional questions from the child dealing with human sexuality/sex. One of the most difficult tasks for many parents is knowing what and when to talk with their children about the gift of human sexuality, or how to give an age appropriate response to their questions.

If parents are asking how do I talk to my children about sexuality/sex, the Diocesan Curriculum Library and A/V Library have age appropriate resources available for check out.

Additional Resources:

Videos

Books

• Beyond the Birds and the Bees, by Gregory K. Popcak, Our Sunday Visitor, 1-800-348-2440

• Talking to Youth About Sexuality: A Parents Guide: edited by Mike Aquilina, Our Sunday Visitor, 1-800-348-2440

Websites

• Family Honor, Inc. website: www.familyhonor.org, click on resources, which includes videos and books for parents and adolescents that can be ordered online.

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